


Red Stained Gold

by Delusional_Lunatic_3791



Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: After their rebirth in Valinor/Aman, And they are going to let everyone know it, Beren and Lúthien are very angry, F/M, Finno is here to save him, M/M, Poor Nelyo has issues, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-12
Updated: 2018-08-12
Packaged: 2019-06-26 12:18:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15663087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Delusional_Lunatic_3791/pseuds/Delusional_Lunatic_3791
Summary: The story of Nelyafinwë and Findekáno. How they came to be, and their life after.





	Red Stained Gold

**Author's Note:**

  * For [StorySpinner0](https://archiveofourown.org/users/StorySpinner0/gifts).



> This is for StorySpinner0 for correctly guessing my dividers. Unto you, I gift a badly-written Russingon fanfiction.

_The Present_

 

_Nelyafinwë_

 

"Nelyo?"

 

I opened one eye. "Yes, Finno?"

 

Finno was squatting down so he could see me. "Why are you under the table?"

 

I shrugged. "It's comfortable down here."

 

"Nelyo, if you wanted to take a nap, you could have used one of the couches," Finno said gently. "Come on, get out of there."

 

"I like it under here," I mumbled, but I complied, sliding out from under the table and pulling myself to my feet.

 

"I'm sorry to wake you," Finno said, also standing, barely meeting my shoulder line, "but it's lunchtime, and I thought you might enjoy some food. Heaven knows you could use some."

 

He said it softly, but I knew what he meant. I was far too skinny than was probably healthy for an elf my size and age.

 

Finno led me to the couch where I had been sitting when the urge to hide struck me. Sitting, he took a cup of tea from a tray laying on a nearby table and handed it to me.

 

"Thank you." I held it carefully, sipping only lightly. Even though it was chilled, as I preferred my tea, I could never forget the feeling of burning liquid being forced down my throat.

 

"I was wondering if you would like to come and sit with me in Aunt Findis' garden," Finno said, letting a hand rest gently on my thigh. "You could bring a book…maybe you could read to me like you used to?"

 

I smiled against the rim of my cup. "Why? Inevitably, you'll fall asleep if you listen to me drone on."

 

"Not at all!" Finno gasped. "Your voice is one of the many reasons I fell in love with you."

 

The tips of my ears reddened. "Thank you."

 

Finno smiled. "Of course. Now eat." He grabbed a biscuit from the tray and held it out to me.

 

I alternated between sipping my tea and munching on the various pastries Finno presented for me. We didn't speak—we didn't need to. We enjoyed each other's presence, silent or not.

 

Eventually, my stomach began to rebel against its tribute, and I held up a hand signaling Finno to cease. "I'm afraid I'll be sick if you feed me any more."

 

Finno pouted, his lower lip puffed and quivering, and I couldn't help myself. Leaning forward, I stole his lips in a kiss, sucking that bottom lip into my mouth and caressing it with tongue and teeth. Finno hummed, raising a hand to cup my face, tracing along my sunken cheek. I shuddered at the touch, leaning into it.

 

"You taste like bread," Finno remarked as he pulled back slightly, our foreheads still touching.

 

"Because you just fed me some," I said in exasperation. Oh, _Finno_. "And is that a complaint I hear?"

 

Finno laughed. "Never. Now come on, let's go bring this back to the kitchens and go outside. It's a beautiful day out—not too hot, not too cool."

 

"And what of your book?" I asked.

 

"I already have one," Finno replied. He stood up and grabbed the now-empty tray. "Come on, let's go."

 

I stood and placed my teacup on the tray. "As you wish."

 

We strode out of the north library and down the stairs. It was a bright day, praise be, and the light was shining through the windows.

 

"Say, Nelyo," Finno asked casually as we reached the kitchens. "Why were you napping on the floor, anyway?"

 

I looked down at my hands, unsure whether to answer. "Um…"

 

"It's all right, Nelyo," Finno said warmly as we crossed the kitchen threshold. "I won't judge you for it."

 

I knew he wouldn't. I also knew he would clasp my hands in his and press kisses to my palms, look me in the eyes and tell me that everything would be just fine. Just another reason why I didn't deserve him.

 

"Nelyo?" Finno was standing by the sink, the water running and the tray under the tap. "If you don't want to talk, I understand. Just know that you can tell me if you want to."

 

I closed my eyes. Should I tell Finno the truth?

 

On the one hand, Finno wouldn't wonder anymore. On the other hand, it might give Finno one more thing to worry about. And I didn't want him to have to worry about me.

 

"Okay, I'm done," I heard Finno say. "Come on, let's go to Aunt Findis' garden. We can sit beneath that one apple tree you like, the one near the stream—"

 

"I was scared," I blurted.

 

Silence.

 

I opened my eyes to see Finno staring at me, his dark eyes wide. "What was that?" he asked quietly.

 

"I-I got scared," I mumbled, fiddling with my hands. "I thought I heard an orc snarling, so I hid. I stayed under until I got tired, then went to sleep."

 

"Oh, Nelyo," Finno said, and his arms were around me. I let him hold me, burying my face into the top of his head and breathing in his scent.

 

"You could have come and found me," Finno murmured, stroking my spine soothingly. "I could have helped."

 

"I'm sorry. I just…whenever the jailor came for me, I used to try and make myself small. I hid under the table they strapped me to. I thought if I did, they would just go away and leave me alone…"

 

I choked back a sob.

 

"Shh, shh, it's all okay," Finno cooed. "I'm here now. Everything's okay."

 

Eventually, with his smell in my nose and his hands on my back, I calmed down enough where I could lift my head to meet his eyes.

 

"I adore you, Nelyafinwë," Finno whispered. "Never forget that."

 

I felt my heart flutter with his words, those seven little words that would always comfort me, always soothe my fëa.

 

"I won't," I said hoarsely. "And I you, Findekáno. Know that."

 

Finno beamed. "I know." He released my back only to grab my right hand. "Now come, let's go to the gardens."

 

We walked together out of Grandfather's castle and to the entrance to Half-Aunt Findis' sprawling gardens.

 

The transition was as jarring as the first cycle of the Anar and Ithil: we went from a hallway of stone into a heaven of colorful brilliance. I took a deep breath, inhaling the intoxicating perfume that was Half-Aunt Findis' collection of plants.

 

The garden was so large it actually took up a portion of the city. It was open to the public and considered a fantastic place for a picnic. Everyone loved the smells, the mazes of flowers, the wonder of it all.

 

What really made it astounding was the placement of the plants.

 

Besides being gifted with gardening, Half-Aunt Findis had a brilliant eye for color. She knew just where to arrange her flowers and bushes to create real images in the plants. Different shades of blues and whites created writhing waters. A few well-placed ferns and roses formed an aerial vision of a flower. Various blooms twisted in an hourglass image. And in the very center of the garden was a painting of reds, yellows, and blues to create the sigil of the House of Finwë.

 

Finno guided me along until we got to the section dedicated to fruit trees and bushes. Then we scrambled up a small hill where a solitary apple tree stretched to the sky, standing watch over the small orchard. I couldn't stop a sigh of relief as I sat down, resting my back against the trunk. Finno chuckled as he dropped down beside me, putting his chin on my shoulder.

 

"We're here," he said. "Feel better?"

 

"Mmmm," I hummed, breathing in the fragrant air.

 

"Excellent." Finno pulled a book out of nowhere. "Now, what do you say we crack open the book and—"

 

"Well, look at this! It's everyone's favorite Kinslayers! Hello, Kinslayers! How goes your day?"

 

I stiffened. I knew that voice, that beautiful, terrible voice.

 

Beren and Lúthien stood halfway up the hill, arm-in-arm. Their faces, his harsh and hers delicate, were set with simmering anger.

 

"Greetings Beren, Lúthien," Finno said coldly. "Can we help you?"

 

Lúthien cocked her head. "Not unless you were willing to throw yourselves back into Mandos." She nodded at me. "Or, in your case, The Void."

 

My heart froze, my hröa seizing. Every bone in my body began to scream.

 

_That place—_

 

_No. No, I was not in The Void. I was in Aman. I was with Finno. Finno, Finno, Finno. Finno was right next to me. I was okay, okay, okay—_

 

"If you're going to be difficult, then I fear I must ask you to take your hatred and leave this place," Finno growled, placing one hand on top of mine. I gripped it, thankful for the anchor.

 

_Finno, Finno, Finno—_

 

"You defiled our home with your taint," Beren pointed out. "Why should we be forbidden to do the same?"

 

"The Valar have generously given you a second life. Do you really want to squander it by spreading hate everywhere you go?" Finno asked.

 

_Finno is right here, I'm okay. Finno's right here._

 

"We're just a little offended that you filthy Ñoldo rats haven't received your proper punishments," Lúthien explained with the air of someone stating the obvious.

 

"The Valar have deemed us purged of our sins," Finno snapped. "Otherwise, we wouldn't be here."

 

_I will never go back to that place._

 

"Well _we_ don't," Beren retorted.

 

"Yes, because your opinion matters _so_ much."

 

_I will stay with Finno._

 

"It should, since we were the ones you wronged," Lúthien snarled.

 

"But you are not the only ones to have been wronged, and the majority of them have forgiven us. They've moved past it; you can, too."

 

_I'm staying with Finno._

 

"Not quickly," Beren sneered. "Not after all you've done."

 

_I will never leave Finno again._

 

"Then leave," Finno cried, jumping to his feet, still clinging to my hand. "Leave, and don't come near us! This is not your castle, despite your father's relationship with my grandfather, and you have no right to torment any who live here! So leave."

 

_Stay with Finno. Always stay with Finno._

 

"But we're having so much fun!"

 

"Leave before I call Laurefindil," Finno snarled. "I'm sure he'd appreciate your games even more than I."

 

The couple blanched.

 

"Coward," Lúthien hissed.

 

"Try me," Finno snapped, his eyes darkening with anger.

 

I closed my eyes and curled into myself, my head pressed to my knees, wishing that these people would go away, go away so Finno could be happy…

 

I heard Beren huff. "Fine. But watch it; your Glorfindel won't be around to protect you forever."

 

"Then Aiwendil will. Get going."

 

Footfalls reached my ears, then Finno was touching my head. "Nelyo? Are you all right?"

 

"I don't want to go to The Void," I mumbled. "I want to stay with you."

 

"And you will." Finno pulled my head up until I was looking at him. Those beautiful dark eyes I loved so much were shining with love. "I am not going to leave you again, I swear it," he said solemnly, pressing our foreheads together. "Okay?"

 

"Okay," I whispered. I believed Finno, I would always trust my light, my dearest love.

 

"Okay." Finno settled back against me, his head on my shoulder, our fingers still entwined. "Do you feel better?"

 

"I do." I did. I felt like the darkness that haunted me had retreated, if only for a little bit.

 

Finno set the book on my lap. "Would you like to read now?"

 

I smiled. "Anything for you, Finno." I picked up the book and opened it—

 

"Finno, why did you bring a children's book?"

 

Finno shrugged apologetically. "I figured, you know, since you never got to read me any bedtime stories, you could start now."

 

I laughed. "Oh, _Finno_."

 

He chuckled as well. "Yes, I know, I'm silly. Now start reading already."

 

I nestled into his side, soaking up the comforting presence of my mate, and began to read.

 

"Once upon a time, there lived two elves who were in love…"

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I may have lied about this being a oneshot. I want to build a backstory behind this fic, and might add on future chapters. This was all inspired by StorySpinner0, so I thank you for that! I really hope you liked it!
> 
> If anyone's confused as to why I'm referencing Glorfindel and Radagast: Glorfindel is almost a Maiar, rather than a half-Maiar like Lúthien. Ergo, he should be able to corral Lúthien if need be. And Radagast is a Maiar, and therefore doubly qualified. There you go.


End file.
